Bring on the Cats!

It’s been a very interesting weekend to be sure. I had a really lovely time with the girls in Sac over the weekend. Everyone seemed to be in really good spirits and had a nice time. That made me happy, which was a breath of fresh air after the disappointment I felt from the night before.

It strange but ever since my newly acquired “single” status, I’ve found myself to be very disappointed in my past mates. I know people change and all that but in some way I can’t help but think that there isn’t really all that much change going on and that maybe I was just that blind to all the flaws because of “love”. Now though? Dear lord I see all too clearly and it’s beginning to hurt my eyes. I look at them now with out rose tinted glasses and fuzzy “blurred” effects and think numerous things to myself, in no particular order…

1. How in the hell did I miss that?
2. How in the hell did I put up with it?
3. Why did I ever put up with it?
4. Dear gods please, please, never let me be that dumb again.

Now I’m not saying that the lovers of my past are “bad people” they aren’t they have good hearts with relatively good (initial) intentions. For some reason because of minute attention spans, selfishness, thoughtlessness or down right obliviousness, they wind up conducting them selves in such a fool-hearted manner that I can‘t help be feel a bit disappointed and upset over the actions that I witness. I can’t even begin to count on my fingers an toes now how many times I wish I could have approached these people and point blank asked them without any holding back, “What in the hell do you think you are doing?” An in return I would receive an honest answer and not some lame excuse like, “I don’t know” or “What are you talking about?” As they walk away. Just for future reference I hate these phrases. I used those phrases as a child when I didn’t want to cop to the truth. I know them oh to well and to hear them come out of a fully grown man’s mouth as justification for poor actions is sad.

With all that being said and a lot of the things I‘ve come across in the resent past, I can safely say I’m not to afraid of becoming a “Crazy Cat Lady” I’m fucking looking forward to it, specially if this par for the course when it comes to matter of trying to find that perfect someone. I throw in the town on that shite, if there really is a Mr. Perfect out there that was made just for me he can come find my ass.